*my second long post of the night... scroll down to the end if u don't wish to read everything*
First off I just wanted to say that I'm not judging anybody and I'm not trying to preach. However, lately I've been sitting back looking at some of the folks post on this board and as my mind tends to do, it began to wander, wonder and question this whole "sex" thing.
Although we aren't the first and won't be the last generation that practices casual sex I tend to think about how our mentality differs from the generations of the past in regards to it. Unlike generations before we are completely surrounded by this constant barrage of sexual images whether it be through TV, radio, books or whatever form of media it is conveyed to us and I think as a generation we are growing numb to what it really is about.
In our quest of busting that ultimate nut I can't help but wonder about how many people inadvertently have been broken in some way by the choices they have made. STD's, Babies, and Broken-Hearts run rampant yet many still have this mentality of "It won't be them" or if they are a casualty in some way they continue what they were doing cus of revenge" or whatever reason.
Now... with that said understand that i'm not saying we all need to go out and become nuns and monks. We all fall short in some way no matter how hard we try and do right. Its rare to find people who are genuinely willing to wait till marriage and realistically most of us won't make it. However, What's REEEEALLY with this messing with folk you really don't give a F!CK abotu bizness?
All my life one of my general rule of thumbs has been if i can't see myself having a baby with this person then no deal and i have yet to meet anybody in person that felt that mutually. Now i know everbody doesn't feel that way nor are they obligated too but I'm kinda tired of seeing young women with bright futures halted cus their belly's now poking out, sad "would have been" father's who lost their unborn son because of abortion, people dissappear cus of their health decling as a result of an STD, and/or just straight up broken hearts because of sex.
Anyway... (i see my post is getting quite lengthy so i'll end here) what is sex to you (oral/intercouse... all of that)? And why did you choose your lifestyle? Any regrets?*
*people on this board reveal more about how they get down to strangers then people that i know in person lol. not judgin by no means... but don't hold back on this one if u don't in others...
P.S. Do what u do but my inquistive mind just would like to understand why things are the way they are sometimes. Not hatin at all.
well i had sex with 2 people my whole life. The first time I was young and not quite wise the 2nd time i was old and dumb, lol. But I plan on waiting til marriage for sex again. I'm not wit da whole casual sex thing. But I guess i feel different about oral sex. I don't give it but I sure have received enough. I cant sit here and honestly say that I can stop getting head. It's just soooo......tempting. I said no to getting head from random people *ahem* fa real this time. Where was I going with this again......
_______________________________ Got my own car and my own crib
I see why you want me to meet ya mama dem!
I wasnt too clear on the question....buutt um, i began havin sex at 17, and i wish i would have waited some more. That is the only regret i have. When you are young you dont realize all of the sh*t that comes along with having sex. Im not/havent been into that "casual" sex thing-if i have no feelings for u-why the hell am i gonna give u the goodies?? :???: But right now my goal is to wait until im married to have sex (meaning intercourse) again.
what is sex to you (oral/intercouse... all of that)? And why did you choose your lifestyle? Any regrets?*
Sex is deep to me. I think it's sumthin powerful and shouldn't be shared with everybody. Nowadayz folks will fool around just about anyone for an easy nut, whether they are feeling the person or not. It hasn't eva been that serious to me. I value my temple way too much to be so generous with it. Plus, i think it'll be beautiful as Heaven to say to man "U had me before u even knew me. I loved u enuff to consider u before i even knew u existed. I'm yours and yours alone :smt057 "...ain't that just precious?
Why did i choose this lifestyle? Well, the more that i learn about myself, the more that i learn that this is deeper than religion. Even if i wasn't a Christian, i don't think i'd be able to handle sex outside of marriage. For 1, i'd probably get addicted and lose my darn mine . 2, i don't know how to detach emotions from sex. I feel like giving up my body is almost like literally giving up a piece of my heart. I cant do that if i'm not certain you'll be around next week...or even tomorrow :???: .
oh...not to mention i have a halo O . How many angels do u know are hoez ? Come on now :smt051
_______________________________ Howard U"The Mecca of Black education""People may doubt what you say; but they will always believe what you do"~Blutifully Human "My hair may be nappy, but my mind is straight"~ Blutifully Human
Thankz for the sig Nate. Kitty kissez to ya!
http://www.blackplanet.com/kndhrtd03http://www.myspace.com/16132905Facebook me!
sex is when u put it in the hole... like andre 3000 said "head dont count, right?" ...
but seriously, i started when i was 17- honestly it was just for an easy nut cuz it was there and it was calling my name *wes.....wes...* and finally i did it- it was coo and i dont hold any regrets although it woulda been nice 2 have feelings for her besides plain old friendship- now i still dont jump around sleepin with erryone and their momma, there has 2 be some kind of feeling between us for anything 2 go down
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What generation are you referring to?
I'm not saying everyone should go out and be a freak, but it's hard to put the sexual attitude of your average 18 year old woman against the attitude of your average 25 - 26 woman year old. And its just as difficult to compare the attitude of your average 20 year old man against the attitude of your average 26 - 27 year old man.
We view sex from different perspectives.
_______________________________ "If you can't have the best of everything, make the best of everything you have."
Roll Out!
There's nothing in my life with regards to sex that I regret. I will however say that I learned a lot about the experience I went through. The sexual experience is best described in a book I read No More Sheets by Juanita Bynum. Ladies, if you haven't read that book you should read it before you start having sex or if you are on the wrong track with you lifestyle.
_______________________________ It's like I can't breathe
It's like I can't see anything
nothing but you
I'm addicted to you
It's like I can't think
without you interrupting me
in my thoughts
in my dreams
you've taken over me
It's like I'm not me
I don't know how many guys on here can agree to this but I've been in the situation where I've just needed that convenient release and it was all about me. However, I've been in the situation where I was doing it more for her benefit, because she needed that release and I wasn't even really into it. I've also been in the situation where it was all about deep feelings and sharing something beautiful between two people "in love." I'm kind of in a situation right now where I'm not even completely feeling the girl but she's hounding the d and I'd be doing it only to have a quick fix. Crazy, but it conflicts me because I want to be "a man" and just do it, but I'm not that type of person.
_______________________________ Many are cold. Few are Phrozen Ice, Ice Baby. Too Cold. Too Cold
hmmm very very interesting
No I do not have any regrets...I consider it a lesson learned...I was raped at a very young age...and I didn't even know it was wrong...and by that time as a little girl I had already "played" around with a little curious george before I even found out that what I wasn't doing wasn't right...and then at some point later in life I felt like what the hell it's not like I'm a virgin anyway...
BUT like I said before I don't have any regrets and now after I've learned a few lessons I make wise decisons
What generation are you referring to?
I'm not saying everyone should go out and be a freak, but it's hard to put the sexual attitude of your average 18 year old woman against the attitude of your average 25 - 26 woman year old. And its just as difficult to compare the attitude of your average 20 year old man against the attitude of your average 26 - 27 year old man.
We view sex from different perspectives.
I'm really directing the question to my generation (I guess the 18-23 range) but please feel free to expound your thoughts ESPECIALLY about the differences you noticed.
I really do appreciate peoples comments btw.
I forgot to ask, but to those who mess with people they don't really care about how do the "what ifs" factor in? Are those in the back/forefront of your mind when u do what u do with who u do?
For example although I don't mess around i never noticed until my freshmen how powerful sex and its repercussions are until I ended up living an experience vicariously through a friend of mine.
To make a long story he came into the dorm one night chillin, received a phone call, and tears begin welling up in eyes. I ask'd him why and he told me that his girlfriend/fiancée (can't remember when they made it official) @ the time just told him she was pregnant. Dude was jacked up.
About 2 weeks or so later dude was able to handle what happened and was looking forward to everything and was speaking positively about the future. Few weeks later he would to come into the room with tears in his eyes again telling me that his girl went and aborted the kid without letting him know despite the fact that they were in committed relationship. He really wanted that kid and he was a broken man after that, and what made it crazy was that he had a crazy lifestyle with the women he was around (cheated on his girl allot... she did the same with him) and really was on some invincible stuff previous too. So to see him break character was like "WHOA!! DAMN...." in my eyes.
The dude above has been through mad stuff since I’ve known him and it amazes me that he is still capable of functioning the way he does. However, he is not the crying type AT ALL and for him to break down like he did straight up dumbfounded me. After that i started looking around and realized "Sex is some POWERFUL SH!T"...
I mean look around, Sex or the thought of motivates us to do alot of what we do, Sex sells the products we use everyday, Sex is all over our music (in various forms), We experience sex visually through TV and Movies and other various forms through osmosis and I really don't see a decline occuring in the near future. I know it wasn't always this way and is it me or does it seem like its getting worse?
anyway like i said before how do the "what ifs" factor in? Are those in the back/forefront of your mind when u do what u do with who u do?
and what do you think about our overexposure to sex?
_______________________________ "These cats drink champagne and toast death and pain / like slaves on a ship talking about who got the flyest chain"
~Talib Kweli
May 14th, 2006 @ 8 AM
I became a Morehouse Man... It's official.
Class of '06 Baby...
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Why did i choose this lifestyle? Well, the more that i learn about myself, the more that i learn that this is deeper than religion. Even if i wasn't a Christian, i don't think i'd be able to handle sex outside of marriage. For 1, i'd probably get addicted and lose my darn mine 
. 2, i don't know how to detach emotions from sex. I feel like giving up my body is almost like literally giving up a piece of my heart. I cant do that if i'm not certain you'll be around next week...or even tomorrow :???: .
oh...not to mention i have a halo O
. How many angels do u know are hoez ? Come on now :smt051 
"My hair may be nappy, but my mind is straight"~ Blutifully Human
Thankz for the sig Nate. Kitty kissez to ya!
...
but seriously, i started when i was 17- honestly it was just for an easy nut cuz it was there and it was calling my name *wes.....wes...* and finally i did it- it was coo and i dont hold any regrets although it woulda been nice 2 have feelings for her besides plain old friendship- now i still dont jump around sleepin with erryone and their momma, there has 2 be some kind of feeling between us for anything 2 go down
Roll Out!
May 14th, 2006 @ 8 AM
I became a Morehouse Man... It's official.
Class of '06 Baby...
